Thursday, November 17, 2005

Secrets of The Temple Revealed


What religion would be complete without a creation story?

Here is the true story of the creation of the Universe, pieced together from many of the remaining fragents of suppressed text from the Temple of The Invicible Beastmaster.

Book of Trepannicis, Chapter 1.

1. Long before the Beginning of Time, The Beast was in the Universe, and the Universe was The Beast.
2. Whensoever something from Outside the Universe crossed paths with the Beast, The Beast would devour it immediately.
3. And it came to pass that The Beast did eat that which was alive also, and parts of The Beast then became a separate entity from The Beast also, and hence the first life became to manifest in the belly of The Beast.
4. A long time followed, and the life inside The Beast did flourish.
5. After a huge span of time, The Beast became aware of the life within, and set Itself against the parasite life, and moved to destroy it.
6. This was the Terrible Time, and The Beast did fly about and contract itself in great convulsions, for which it did to rid itself of the life within.
7. All inside was chaos, and all that did live was in peril of dying, and all that did not live remained still not alive.
8. Now, at this point in time, the race of The Beastmaster had grown and flourished inside The Beast, and in the ensuing chaos, the superior race were faced with unprecedented perills, as they were buffeted mercilessly, and their cities cast down. And so it was, that many perished, and of those that did not perish were there those that wished to perish.
9. And the race of The Beastmaster then did send forth its strongest and bravest to explore and find out whence came this destruction, and tasked them also to find a way to effect its end.
10. Among those sent thus forth was The Beastmaster himself.
11. And it came to pass that from one of this first band of journeymen, a certain Beastmaster, who was bestowed the title of The Invincible Beastmaster, went farther than any other, even to the sides of The Beast Itself, and cutting a Way with his mighty Axe, was the first living thing to see the Universe outside the Beast.
12. The Beast, feeling Itself wounded, turned and encountered The Beastmaster.
13. With a roar that shook the Universe, The Beast turned back upon itself and dove upon The Beastmaster to devour Him.
14. The Beastmaster, being the wisest of all living things, ran upward toward the head of The Beast, causing The Beast to bite instead upon its own tail where The Beastmaster had been before but was not now.
15. The Beastmaster did keep himself ever before the gaze of the angry beast, and caused It to devour ever more of Itself in an effort to reach and destroy The Beastmaster.
16. The Beastmaster ran thus for an incredibly long period, pursued always by the mighty head and jaws of the Beast until finding himself upon the forehead of the beast, and with no other place to run but into the very jaws, did the Beastmaster then with his mighty axe smite the brow of The Beast.
17. Whereupon this thing was done, did The Beast burst asunder into many fragments and pieces, spewing forth all of his continence and contents.
18. Then was the Beastmaster hurled a great distance, his axe planted deep in the brains of The Beast.
19. Having no other food, this did he eat of, and gained he thus all the knowledge of The Beast and all knowledge of all Things that The Beast did eat.
20. That which was life within The Beast was thus spread across the Universe and that which was of The Beast did also live still, and became they them smaller Beasts of mean and dangerous spirit, but all did fear The Beastmaster for what he had done.
21. And that which was in The Beast but not of The Beast was clean and noble and good and spread and increased, and that which was of The Beast became evil and sought ever to devour all, even unto each other, and once again become The Beast.
22. Thus did The Beastmaster find himself alone for a time in the Universe, and long did he search for his kind, encountering many living things, but never did he see them again.
23. After a time, The Beastmaster called to himself those creatures that were pleasing to him, and using his great knowledge, raised them up to do his bidding.

(End Chapter 1.)

2 Comments:

Blogger BEAST said...

Let us give thanks to the Beastmaster for liberating our otherwise doomed souls!!!

Sincerely
The Beast
High Priest of the TEmple of The Invincible Beastmaster

12:09 am  
Blogger UberKuh said...

All hail the beast, and cheesy '80s movies. :)

6:43 pm  

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